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Tea motherf***er!

I saw this photo on Twitter on Friday and, I gotta say, try as I might I quite simply cannot in good conscience let this one go through to the keeper.

Is that tea he’s drinking??? By joves old bean I think it is!

The coach of the New Zealand national football team is drinking a cuppa tea luv at a press conference ahead of a crucial World Cup qualifier.

What’s he trying to say by doing this?

That he couldn’t be more English if he got badly sunburnt on an overcast day walking across a pedestrian crossing with three other guys on their way to losing to the Germans on penalties?

Is that really the image he wants to portray – a guy who says he learned everything he knows from Marcello Bielsa – reminding us that his true spiritual home is the land of two formations – 4-4-2 and 4-4-2 with a diamond midfield?

Is that it?

Alternatively, perhaps he’s trying to compare himself to the man who achieved the greatest miracle since Moses parted the Red Sea? A man who accepted a mission even more impossible than the All Whites beating Argentina over two legs? The guy who won a World Cup with England – Sir Bobby Charlton:

Embed from Getty Images

Or perhaps he is trying to emulate another of his role models, a man widely regarded as the world’s undisputed king of fine, free flowing, Champagne football?

Embed from Getty Images

Or maybe Anthony Hudson just likes tea.

Whatever the reason, I will say this: He just went up a million miles in my estimations.

I love anyone who embraces their culture. If I was the All Whites coach I would love nothing more than to stuff my face with a plate full of Bucatini all’Amatriciana while Winston Reid sits next to me extolling the virtues of catenaccio.

And the more I look at that photo the more he looks ice cold cool. Badass even…

Badass like:

The only way he could top this would be to mix it up with a bit of Kiwiana. I would give my back teeth to see him whip out a Griffins Ginger Nut and dunk that sucker.

Maybe next time?

I gotta say though, no matter how cool he undoubtedly is when he imbibes his national drink, he will never be as cool as my countryman Andrea Pirlo imbibing ours…

Categories: All Whites

Tagged as:

Enzo Giordani

A grassroots football enthusiast based in Auckland, New Zealand, and a fan of the most magnificent club on earth - A.S. Roma. More info (including e-mail address) can be found here: https://in-the-back-of-the.net/about/

3 replies

  1. Hi Enzo, I think you have got the wrong end of this…

    Anthony was of course born in Seattle, where they have an incredibly strong history of tea drinking – witness the Perennial Tea Room in Pike Place Market and “Floating Leaves Tea” in Ballard.

    Anthony is incredibly proud of his Seattle roots and thus turns to tea to emphasise the point whenever he can.

    It has nothing whatsoever to do with high-profile managers Jose Mourinho and Sam Allardyce having also being photographed sipping tea in the UK, and I know it frustrates Anthony intensely that his tea drinking is thus often misinterpreted as being an English thing, when he is of course American, and would like everybody to know and respect this.

    Hope this helps.

  2. Maybe that was a mug of coffee. Why not even a good sized mug of orange juice. That was definitely no “piddling cup” of tea.

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